FANDOM: Stargate SG-1
PAIRINGS: Daniel/Vala (references to Daniel/Sha're, Vala/Tomin)
CHARACTERS: (this part) Hank Landry, Vala Mal Doran, Daniel Jackson
RATING: NC-17/Adult (see warnings)
WARNINGS: Serious triggers for references to abortion & miscarriage
TIMELINE/SPOILERS: Vala backstory; 10x20 Unending
ARCHIVE: Permission granted; drop me a URL if, for some reason, you aren't afraid to archive it -- I'll link to it from my blog.
CATEGORY/GENRE: Angst, darkfic, missing scenes
SERIES: "Big Mistake" for one_prompt "I think we made a big mistake"
WORD COUNT: 611/1897
SUMMARY: Missing scenes from Crusade, Prometheus Unbound, and Unending, connected by a subject women don't speak of in public.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Mentions here of Jacek & Inago, not exactly the most wonderful characters you've ever met. Also, I'm using the DVD commentaries to interpret The Daniel/Vala Hurt/Comfort Scene in Unending.
Part 1: Corned Piggot
Part 2: Survival by Symbiont
“No matter how consistently Jacek betrayed your trust, I'm a poor substitute for your dad.” Landry snapped a pink flower from one of the fuzzy-leafed plants he called an African violet. “But as a dad who's all but lost a daughter because of this time-dilation bubble, I can understand some of your loss. And Dr. Jackson's.” He lifted Vala's limp hand and placed the flower on her palm. “Let Daniel comfort you. He blames himself, you blame yourself, but it's no one's fault. You need each other to get through this.”
In the light cast by full-spectrum fluorescent bulbs, the tiny bloom shimmered with a fine, velvety texture, its minuscule center of yellow nubs proclaiming the ephemeral beauty of fragile young life. She nodded, sighing, “I think we made a big mistake.”
Landry barely stopped a disappointed groan before Vala hastily added, “I mean, we shouldn't have agreed to never speak of it.”
He smiled sadly and gave her a reassuring hug before she rushed out of the greenhouse.
In the hours that followed, she and Daniel cried in each other's arms and shared past sorrows made less painful in comparison to their present one.
“Sha're couldn't conceive during my year with her on Abydos because I hadn't kept her in Ra's sarcophagus long enough.” Daniel held her tightly as she'd tucked her face into the crook of his neck; his breath at each word sank into her hair.
She turned her head so to speak, the taste of her tears and his skin still on her lips. “But you couldn’t have spared another moment if Jack had set a bomb to explode in seven minutes.”
“Yeah, I guess.” He stroked her back through the satiny fabric of her dressing jacket. “But if I'd taken the blast from Tomin's staff instead of you, maybe you wouldn't have miscarried.”
She dismissed the notion with a short chuckle. “Adria wouldn't have healed you.”
“I was wearing armor. You weren't.”
“You can keep trying to bear the guilt for this, but I assure you: your shortcomings do not include your reproductive skills.”
His sudden burst of laughter at her quip dislodged her from his lap, so they moved from the floor at the foot of the bed to a more comfortable arrangement under the covers.
“I was pregnant once, before Adria.” She spoke softly; it was a story she'd never told. “Inago never knew.”
He said nothing, and let her stay nestled into his side with an arm encircling her.
“I considered giving up the life of a free agent, but I was running two schemes at the time. I guess learning the symptoms of pregnancy served me well later, when the Ori dropped me into Ver Isca.” She snuggled closer to him, until she could hear his heartbeat. “Arlos's mother had a reputation for helping women 'resume their cycles', so to speak. I had to acquire a hyperdrive gauge mount to pay her.”
“So... stealing her necklace was 'change' for overpayment?”
“Steal? I didn't-- well, yes, I did.” Vala shrugged. “But I was doing her a favor; that dreadful necklace didn't match any of her outfits.”
Daniel's snort of laughter developed into a full-fledged belly laugh.
Vala laughed with him, even though it was more a release of stress than validation of her wit. As she drifted to sleep after their mirth subsided, she smiled and concluded that not all mistakes required regret, and that Daniel's laughter (a rare, wondrous sound) was as effective a healing device as she could ever wish.